wanna reconsider??

Amy and I became good friends in the last few days. Initially she found it ackward so blocked me out of her chat list. But two days later she unblocked me again. And we have been talking again. I have been very open about my life with Amy. She pretty much knows what I do, who I meet and what I eat?? I have even told her about how I wasn't sure about Lucy and I was struggling to hold onto the relation as we werent compatible at all. So I finally told Amy that I called it off with Lucy. Amy was surprised but hoped Lucy would get better. After all only a woman can understand another woman.

Then I did something really strange.. I asked Amy, if she would like to reconsider us both together again? If she would like to see how things go? She was more than delighted to accept my proposal.. So today we kinda got into courtship, trying to explore each other and see how compatible we are.. hope she is the one.. :)

It had to end..

I don't know what to write about today... I called it off with Lucy... Compatability issues was the reasons I gave to her. She didn't buy it at first and we argued for quite a bit. I was trying to be patient. I didn't wanna hurt her more than she already is. She told me she was in love with me and its difficult. At some point I felt I was responsible entirely for this. But then I never expressed my feelings towards her, I never told her I loved her. We been just getting to know each other.. Breaking Up is always the difficult part. Its more difficult if they were your friends first and you wish you can stay as friends post break up too... By the end of the day Lucy was fine, she believes maybe it wasn't meant to be. I know she isnt fine, but I really hope she would get better soon.

Back from the tour...

From the flight today morning at 6am

I got back from Rajasthan today morning at bout 7am. Pretty insane weekend we had there.. in the last 50 hours, managed to sleep only for 5 hours in all. It's been quite a fun and adventurous trip. I have been in touch with Lucy all the days on phone. Spent quite a few hours everyday talking to her. But I guess I missed Amy more. Amy wrote to me before I left, saying she would miss me when I am gone. And I promised her I would try to make it on the chat as soon as I get some internet connection. But I was too busy to find an internet connetion. I was more than happy to me back, not that I get to talk to Lucy more but that I will be able to meet Amy on chat. I am still confused about Lucy. Cos we are so different from each other. She speaks different, is from a different culture, different upbringing, different food, different reasoning.. everything is different. On the other hand I am getting more comfortable with Amy. I wish I was more sorted in my head...

Missing...

I didn't hear from Amy for two days until today. I guess she didn't want to talk to me after I had blew her off. But I am more than happy to have heard from her today. Cos I never really thought il get to talk to her again. So this is really good. I am very happy. We chatted for a couple of hours. It was really comforting talking to her again. I am heading off to Rajasthan for a show tomorrow, will be back only by Sunday. I am sure gonna miss talking to her while I am out of town.

End of a beginning

After talking to Amy for three days I really began to like her. I told her every little dirty secret about my life, trying to drive her away from me. But I guess the more honest I was, the more she began to like who I am. Even I have begun to like her but I am with Lucy. This doesn't seem right. I have already mentioned about Amy to Lucy and she didn't like it so much. She asked me to maintain a distance from Amy. So I thought I'll stop beating around the bush and not give her any hope for a future with me. I was trying to avoid her since yesterday but she kept messaging me on Facebook asking me if I was alright. I was really tempted to write to her and talk to her. I tried my best to ignore and stay away but I couldn't. So I finally came on gtalk and began chatting with her. I wasn't really sure what I was doing or what I wanted to do but I told her about Lucy. I told her that I was sorry but I didn't give her any hopes for the future if it wasn't mean to be. I asked Amy if we could still be friends. Poor Amy who had begun to like me, was really upset. She told me she couldn't be my friend now but wished me luck with Lucy. She sounded genuine and I knew I was gonna lose a good friend. So I continued talking to her, asking her questions so that she can reply to them and still continue to talk to me.

I don't know if what I am doing is right. But I feel I am gonna lose a good friend. A friend that I have just known for three days yet feels its been three decades that we have known each other.

Finally!! Gotcha!!

It was quite a boring day. I have no idea why am I at home today. I should be at work right now but I guess everything happens for a reason. So like usual when I am bored, I browsed onto that matrimonial site to see what my dad was up to. And woah.. I see Amy online on it. I wasn't sure if I should write to her but I did. I wrote to her a 'hello' and she was quick to respond a 'hi' back to me. We continued chatting on the website for a while before we exchanged our gmail ids and began chatting on gtalk. We spent over an hour talking to each other. I don't remember what did we talk about but it was quite fun. I didn't know she would be so much fun to hang out with. She sounds really interesting and patient. I am hoping we get to talk more.. but somewhere in the back of my mind I am wondering if this is right cos I am kinda courting Lucy right now and I don't wanna hurt either Amy or Lucy by my actions. I hope I make up my mind real quick.

Ooo lala... she is hot!!

There has been this girl I have known since a month now and we been 'hitting off' quite well. You can call her Lucy. Lucy and I got very friendly and its been going quite good. She is super hot and very nice in person. We been talking quite a lot and its been going great.. I don't think I really care about Amy now, now that I have Lucy! hmmm...

Did you just say something??

I had almost given up hope. I really did wanna talk to her.. but something just happened... hahaha.. she replied!!! but my hope is shortlived.. it wasn't her.. it was her parents.. :( who say they are praying and waiting on the Lord. They say they will get back to me soon. Isn't one month not enough???